Joshua Thorin Messer

So in one of my recent manic episodes I actually had an idea that I think could have potential. Something earlier in the day had got me good and fed up with internet logins. I would like to hereby dub it Messer’s Catastrophe of Infinite Login Proliferation. Or something.

Dig this. I’ve noticed more and more often lately that various internet fora are requiring me to fucking register to simply search their sacred ramblings. Now, when I’m looking for the solution to some stupid configuration corner I’ve decided myself into, this is a huge pain up my nether regions. In a word: bummer. Not only that, but if I want to actually say anything anywhere, same deal. Now this isn’t the end of the world. It’s not as big a deal as I’m making it. But it is a real killer that at all of these sites, I have to identify myself, and remember my login name, and remember my password, and update my email if that changes due to getting too much spam from spreading my email address around like wild oats across the internet.

That is the real trouble. My identity (if I can be allowed a(nother) buzzword) is spread out and scattered and extremely brittle under this kind of system. To me it’s useless for everyone to require me to come up with a password, because I’m registered at so many places that I just use the same damn credentials everywhere. If the username is available. And if my password passes muster. Sometimes it’s a minimum of six characters. Sometimes a number is required. Sometime a capital letter is required. Sometimes one or both of those must occur within the first 6 characters of the password (not kidding. This seems overly restrictive for no good reason.) Sometimes = or * or % thrown in for extra weirdness are not allowed.

On top of this, I have to tell each and every damn one of these sites my name, my email address, and whatever other identifying information they happen to want. When I get to the site, I have to remember whether their username field is actually a username or if it is one of my email addresses (and then: Which one?)

So everyone probably knows where this is going, but it’s getting late, and I have to go lie absolutely still for a couple hours while my mind races meaninglessly. More later.